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Four Myths of Adoption
Many people are interested in adopting, but never move forward because they lack the right information. Following are the truths about four common adoption myths:
1. “Adoption costs too much.”
Reality: Depending on the circumstances, the cost of adoption ranges from nothing upwards of $30,000. But you may not know just how much assistance is available for parents who adopt. For example, you can take advantage of the federal adoption tax credit.
Also, grants for thousands of dollars are often available to families pursuing adoption. Other options may include adoption funding programs at your place of employment, reductions in fees for special needs children, and financial assistance from your church. All these make adoption affordable for almost anyone willing to pursue the options available. In the end, if the Lord is calling you to adopt, He will provide the finances for your child.
2. “Isn't there a great chance that a child's birth parents will get a child back after the adoption?”
Reality: In modern adoption, laws have been established that nearly eliminate this possibility. It is practically unheard of in international adoption. In domestic adoption and adoption out of foster care, this possibility can be avoided by obtaining competent legal advice. This kind of counsel will ensure that all legal papers are signed before the child is placed.
3. “Adopted children probably have many emotional issues I won't know how to handle.”
Reality: It's true that some children who have had traumatic experiences may have an increased chance of having emotional and behavioral issues. But the truth is that any child, adopted or biological, may present these types of challenges. Any hurt child, whether adopted or biological, desperately needs a Christian family to help him navigate through his difficulties from a biblical perspective. You might feel a certain child is beyond your ability to handle, but if you remain available to how God might want to use you, He will equip you to raise any child you are obedient to bring into your home.
4. “I may not be able to love an adopted child as I would a biological child.”
Reality: While many people fear this very thing before adopting, it is difficult to find parents who actually do struggle with this issue after they've adopted. According to research, 95 percent of adoptive parents say they experience a strong attachment to their child. In addition, this same study concluded that adopted adolescents are as deeply attached to their adoptive parents and extended family as their non-adopted siblings (Growing Up Adopted study, Search Institute, Minneapolis, 1994).